Saturday, May 06, 2006

Family Therapy - part 1

In light of my daughter's recently discovered powers to remake the planet as she sees fit, I have decided now would be an ideal time to repair some of the damage that has occurred in our relationship over the years. Once upon time, she fought bravely at my side to help me achieve my perfectly reasonable goal of taking over the world. Now she won't return my calls.

None the less, in an effort to build a bridge between us, I went to see her at the Avenger's Mansion in Manhattan. I had Master Mind with me so that everyone else there thought I was a Mary Kaye Cosmetics saleswoman.

I was shown to the convalescence wing where Wanda was resting on a king side bed. Two men stood at the head of the opulent bed, slowly wafting her with giant feather fans. Another young man was massaging her feet and a fourth waited with a jug of water in case she wanted her goblet refilled.

"Feeling better, my daughter?" I asked.

She turned towards me. "I'm surprised they let you in," she sniffed.

"I'm surprised the mansion is here actually. I thought Stark wasn't going to rebuild it after the, um, incident."

"This is an historical monument. The city made him rebuild it. Especially after I mentioned that I wanted it done. It's amazing how much better everyone treats me now."

"Yes, 'M' day was quite an eye opener for a lot of us. I, of course, knew always knew you had tremendous power. And that you are very, very intelligent. And beautiful. Did I mention that?"

Wanda just rolled her eyes. "What is it you want father?"

I moved over towards her and sat on the edge of the bed. "What I want is for us to be a close family once again. I want us to do things together like we use to. Things such as . . taking over the world."

"Hmm, I don't think so."

"But Wanda, with our combined powers we will be unstoppable! We can rule the galaxy together as father and daughter!"

"No, not until you apologize to Pietro and he forgives you. Then maybe we can talk about it. In family therapy."

"Apologize to Pietro?! Are you insane?! That's absurd! I have done nothing wrong to him! That boy is a pathetic disappointment! That is in no way my fault!"

Of course I didn't actually say that to Wanda. Then she would never help me conquer the Earth. What I did actually say was - "What ever you want my darling."

Now I'm going to have to actually apologize to that simpering, pathetic, worthless . .
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